Waiting To Exhale...

I know this seems to be a reoccurring theme on this blog but at this point in my life I’m really just waiting to exhale release myself for worries from the fear of being out in this world alone... (dramatic I know)... I’m starting to trust people within things and part of my inner self that others have only guessed were there... I’m really ready to have for lack a of better phrase a Winehouse moment, something she would only be able to sing about...
..... The thing is I thought that I found that person and I couldn’t even say their name without smiling simply cause this person just made me happy... and to tell the truth there is nothing wrong with my life but this person made me feel something that I haven’t felt in such a longtime happy truly and I haven’t felt that way in I can’t really remember how long.... The problem is that I got all worked up and went to this person’s house only to be confronted with a dark house and driveway... I was standing in the cold like a damn fool waiting for this person to answer the phone, the door, a text... the Mad Black woman came out and I was like you have exactly 30 seconds to answer the door or I’m leaving... so left and stepped away pissed like you've never seen before... I get several phone calls and one conversation later apologies and promises... but the thing is a man can’t live on promises alone, but the hopeless romantic in me tells me they will come through and make my dreams come true... the realist in me is about to move on to the next one... Why Do We Really Think People Can Change???